Dear Labor

Dear Labor,

For the majority of yesterday, and today, I've been contracting. While this may be great fun for you and all your little labor fairy buddies, it is not great fun for me and my aching back. Nor is it fun when I have contractions consistently for over an hour and BAM they're gone. It makes me wish that you were, indeed, a real person so I could punch you in the face and be on about my business. Instead, my back hurts, my butt hurts, I'm tired, I'm sore and my breasts feel like they are getting ready to fill up the minute I deliver. Actually, that part I don't mind so much. I do need the food supply for baby. However, the other crap, that can go away. Really. So, here's how we make it go away. You quit making me just feel like I'm gonna burst, and actually send a little labor my way, and I'll cry, sweat and push out a little bundle. Then, I might actually be able to rest a few hours while bundle is swaddled warmly. I could use this. I'm not getting any sleep with what you are doing to me, and I'm not going to be sleeping for a week after baby is home. I'm actually HOPING with all HOPE that my water breaks in the middle of the night. I don't care about the mess, I just want it to happen so I can get this show on the road. I'd love to have this baby on Halloween, but with these contractions and the annoying, "Totally labor...HaHa YOU THOUGHT" you keep pulling on me, I'll take what I can get.

Signed,
Mother to be about to reach in and grab baby herself