Last year I was writing open letters to my oven and to labor fairies wishing to meet my little bundle of unknown gender. Now, his first birthday approaches, and with it comes yet another milestone.
Ethan had goldfish crackers. Grayson wanted them, quite terribly. He gave his mightiest excited squeal, pulled with all his might, and there he was, up on two feet, reaching for the bowl. I dropped everything and came running to snap a picture seconds before he dropped back down to his knees.
I clapped and giggled. Grayson squealed with delight (mainly because I was squealing) and came crawling at lightning speed to offer me a drooled on goldfish cracker, all 9 teeth showing during his giggles.
I'm not ready for this. I'm not ready to put that number 1 candle on his cake and watch him smash his own special cake. I don't want him to get bigger. As challenging as he has been, I want him to stay my baby. He's my last baby, and I want to enjoy every second of it, all over again. I miss his new baby smell, his new baby cry and watching everything happen for the first time. I know he has to grow up though, and there will be lots of other things I get to see for the first time, but this...I'm not ready to let go of yet.
Man, where's the Delorean when you need it?
1 comment:
I do the same thing each time Finley has a birthday!! For some reason, it really gets me when they turn 2. I cried all day the day Jack turned 2... then low and behold I found out I was pregnant AGAIN. Nonetheless, I cried when Finn turned 2 and I'm NOT pregnant this time around.
So, pull up your big girl mommy panties, enjoy Sunday, and the bawl like a baby after the kids go to bed!! Sending you hugs!
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